Thursday, January 26, 2012

"Yes, Sir!"

Had a dream the other night in which I was back in high school and the principal, dressed as Sgt. Slaughter, gave out cases of Miller Genuine Draft to students while yelling at them. There's more to the story, of course, but then again, after that, what else need be said?

Monday, January 23, 2012

Six Shots till Summation (L'Edition Étrange)

I'm not sure what to say about La Bête other than it's a strange, strange film. Long story short, a well-to-do young Englishwoman by the name of Lucy Broadhurst (yeah, I said Broadhurst) travels to a quaint estate nestled within the hinterlands of France to meet and subsequently marry a man who has the property to match her wealth. Unfortunately, the situation is not as it initially appears; and by that, I mean things are fucking weird. 

To answer the inevitable question: Yes, I kept the pictures relatively tame, for I'd rather not spoil all the magic contained within the film's celluloid folds. In answer to your second question: Yes, the second picture depicts a woman pleasuring herself with a bed frame. 

What does it all mean? Damned if I know. 

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Yo, It's About That Time

"If I was on that plane with my kids, it wouldn’t have went down like it did.There would have been a lot of blood in that first-class cabin and then me saying, 'OK, we’re going to land somewhere safely, don’t worry.'" - (Marky) Mark Wahlberg, regarding the events of September 11, 2001*

‎"I don't get down with jerking off, dude. Look. I don't believe in everything that the church says. I try to do the right thing. I lead a clean and pure life. I'm a married guy. I have a beautiful wife. Sex is not the most important thing to me, being horny all the time, spanking the -- I mean, it's not against the law. You can do whatever you want. And it's not like, 'I shouldn't do it because of my faith. I'm just not really that into it that much anyway." - Wahlberg weighing in on yet another pivotal topic**


* I can only wonder, is that with or without Donnie D on the backup?
** But you said feeling the rhythm is your occupation, Mark!
*** Yeah, I just linked to Men's Journal. Next up, a swarm of locusts.

Friday, January 13, 2012

Alternative Lifestyle

I've been told that I'm insensitive by some, hypersensitive by others, extraterrestrial by a few, and psychotic by one or two. I've also been accused of lacking a strong opinion about anything, or that any feelings exhibited are merely simulated emotions. In protest of such vicious allegations, I offer up the following snippet of dialogue lifted from a conversation between myself and a friend.

Avis: Not long after Mab and I moved into this house, I approached a guy one night at a bar where I was playing, which is strange because I never approach guys at bars. He seemed really cool and we got involved pretty quickly. He moved in within a month. I felt like it was going to be something potentially very good for me. Something for the long haul. He ended up needing a lot of financial support, and he stole prescription meds from my mom! I confronted him about it, and it was pretty clear that he was lying to me. He also may have cheated on me, but I'm not sure. Nevertheless, I broke up with him and then gathered up all of his things into trash bags. It was terrible.. (bitter laugh)

Me: Hefty, or Glad?

Case closed. 

Wolf Parade - Podbody's Nerfect

Tuesday, January 03, 2012

Same Title, Different Song IV

The word hurricane may evoke thoughts of something powerful, sweeping, dramatic, destructive, compelling, uncontrollable, pitiless, and beautiful; as it should, given its status as a meteorological force of nature. If a song takes the moniker unto itself, one would hope that it bears similarities of some kind to its namesake. In this case, we have two such melodies but the real question is, do they stack up? You, Defrosted Reader, must judge for yourself.*

Athlete - Hurricane

30 Seconds to Mars - Hurricane

* And judge for me, too while you're at it since I don't know shit about music.