Thursday, March 15, 2007

The Cat's out of the Bag

Golly. At this point, I suppose there is no denying the truth about what Sparky Spark has been up to recently.

(The Korean Tourism Organization's prestigious R&D team has a new point man, that's what.)


Monday, March 12, 2007

You know a guy is the Baron of Bundang when:

A) He offers up a toast like 'Cheers to Terry Michos!' and people are pretty much obliged, nay, enthusiastic, to respond in kind.

B) He -basically- body checks some random guy within Samsung Plaza, and refuses to acknowledge the poor bastard's cries of anger. Furthermore, the man is so powerful that he continues to ignore the chump as the flustered individual's attempt to chase him down is quelled by an associate.

C) Given the offer of a late night 노래방 extravaganza, he accepts, and then counters with 'We need some beer'. While one portion of the group (the one most enamored with the concept of singing their hearts out) ventures forth on an expedition to acquire the aforementioned soma, the man decrees that he doesn't need that song-and-dance shit to fulfill his fantasies, and proceeds to another locale. Singers be damned!

D) Upon hearing that a comrade must depart, he suggests that his associate down a bottle of soju for 'the long bus ride home', even if that bus ride is, in actuality, twenty minutes in length. The other dude is powerless to resist, as the recommendation is merely a posit of the utmost veracity, accentuated by the greatness of the situation.

E) He contends that he built that -Gu on rock 'n' roll (with some assistance from Starship), and again, no one is inclined to disagree.

F) At one point, he removes his Miami Heat jersey and throws it at a random Korean woman, who consequently swoons from the prospect of being so lucky.

This stuff doesn't grow on trees. It takes power, personality, and prowess.

Finally, for those of you who, like myself, lament the sabbatical of the real force behind Psychedelic Kimchi (and to those that played the occasional coin-op game), I offer a final, imperative remark.


Thursday, March 01, 2007

Mud, Honey, and the Mange that Would Not Burn (Rarefaction)

Today was a national holiday, and I had some free time (as I'm not one to plot several nefarious, social misadventures, which is to say that I'm not the belle of the ball, and as such, I'm about as cool as the macumba here in our beloved republic) so I sat down to watch two films, one of which I had viewed previously, and the other an entirely new experience. The former being Peter Jackson's interpretation of King Kong, and the latter the Island.

First and foremost, I'm a bit picky with regard to the large monster runs amok amidst the turbulence of human society genre. Call me a snob, call me a dork; either way, I've a -decidedly arousing- passion for rubber monsters and overgrown monstrosities. When something doesn't work for me, with such a theme, it just doesn't, and Kong's Fantastic Isle of Shitty Dinosaurs is a prime example of distasteful presentation. The 'terrible' lizards just came across as laughable at best, and the lack of considerable, visceral gore precipitated my disdain. Fuck, in the thirties, they had an Allosaurusish get its jagged mouth torn agape and, furthermore, you truly felt as if the two combatatants were congenitally devoted to carnage. In Peter Jackson's production, we are treated to a cartoonish, unabashedly amateurish display of sportsmanship between the mighty Kong and his fellow inhabitants.

(Let's not even begin to approach the dance routine with Naomi Watts.)

To be honest, I'm rather fond of Peter Jackson for several reasons, the least of which not being Braindead / Dead Alive. He's a great director, and I wouldn't be lying if I said that the first forty minutes of King Kong were captivating, as was the scene in which the worms attack the sailor. Nonetheless, nothing shall salvage the film for me.

As for the Island, I've nothing much to say. Not a good movie by any means, but I hadn't expected it to be. My intention was to gain an enhanced perspective of Scarlett Johansson. Recently, I had postulated that she was inferior to several Korean actresses/performers, namely, one in particular. Upon further inspection, I'm going to take that comment back - well, to rephrase: I'm going to say that there are beautiful people throughout the world, and let's celebrate all of the people we'll never be suave enough to entrance with our misguided wiles. Fair enough?

Speaking of movies, why not check out something absurd, like Bava's Demoni? Now that's a memorable film.

General Grievous