Microfracture Surgery

Don't call it a comeback. It's just that, well, reading all this stuff about Cat Stevens's and Jay-Z's returns to recording has me feeling a little nostalgic, a little amped*.

(And, like the aforementioned albums from Messrs. Islam and Carter, this is guaranteed to be a suckfest. I'll do my best to make sure of that, don't you worry.)

So it's not back to the lab here so much as it's a quick glance to make sure the equipment's still working. I'm trying to put myself back together like Sauron/Voldemort/Humpty Dumpty/T-1000/ToeJam & Earl's fucking spaceship**...shit takes time, nah mean?

Make no mistake, though: shit is real. I'ma give it my all like In the Family. Reason: unfinished business***. The world (and by which I mean me and Idealjetsam/Mr. T; the rest of y'all are just the dream of some autistic kid) NEEDS Psychedelic Kimchi like grass needs soil. Like SPAM cans need pull-tabs. Like Blahzay needs Blahzay.

Like that.

Ride or die.

Galvatron*_*

*Most of my heroes don't appear on no stamps. And, yes, that's a double negative. Fuck you 'gon do?

** Don't bust my ass on semantics here, lest I pontificate on the anthropomorphic nature of an alien starship crash landed to Earth which sends out funkotronic psychic beakons to its pilots. I've had a long day, okay? Fuck with me and I'll bombard you with tomatoes.

*** It really burns my conscience that I didn't review the final chapter of Capote's In Cold Blood (Spoilers: they die), and, most importantly to me, that denz and I -- mostly I -- never got around to conducting the Babe Draft. Those may or may not be forthcoming. But let us be clear on one thing: The Catcher In the Lye never happened. And a lot of those Psychedelic Poetry posts were garbage like a grouch couch. I'm man enough to admit it.

But what has REALLY eaten me alive is the Bill Simmons homage NBA 2006/2007 regular season preview I had planned, containing quotes from The Breakfast Club. That shit was nice. Picture Lebron munching on his fingernails, followed by the Jon Bender line "You keep eating your fingers you won't be hungry for lunch."

Damn.