The Handshake Felt around the World

You know who gives one hell of a handshake?

Mr. Eoin Forbes, that's who. His elfin appearance belies a vice grip of unfathomable proportions long since honed by countless hours spent gripping beer, soju, and whiskey bottles. Three days have passed, and my own hand is swollen like a steaming hot bratwurst just plucked off the grill.

Life's checklist, amended.