Thursday, September 29, 2005

Christmas movies that aren't Christmas movies

Halloween is just over a month away. As a DVD and film connoisseur, one of the things I like about the end of October is that I don't have to worry about what type of film to watch (something that almost literally keeps me awake nights). There are so many to choose from: John Carpenter's Halloween, or Halloween II (the rest are pure garbage), The Exorcist, Romero zombie flicks, The Simpsons Halloween specials...the list, while far from endless, is relatively long. Longer than my Valentine's Day collection of movies, of which there's...hold on, let me think...Spider-Man? He's a genuinely sentimental and caring fellow, isn't he? OK, if not Spidey, then how about The Godfather? I mean, no one embodies filial piety, devotion, and unequivocal love quite like Michael Corleone (not including the sequel, where he, the bastard, orders a hit on his own brother).

But while thinking about what movies help make the Halloween season (an especial time when I woefully mourn the end of my childhood -- which ended sometime last year, by my own estimate -- because I can no longer receive free candy from strangers) so special, I also started thinking about the films I enjoy watching during the Christmas season. Most of them have little or nothing to do with Christmas, but for reasons unknown -- or, at most, partially understood -- these movies help put me in the Christmas mood and give your old pal/enemy Sparkles some yule-tide cheer:

[in no particular order]

To Kill a Mockingbird

Many people are aware that Robert Duvall makes his screen debut in the film, but few know that it is also the debut of actress Lindsay Lohan. It's true.

The Godfather

I don't know what it is about this movie that screams Christmas. Is it the garroting? The execution of a crooked police officer? Abe Vigoda?

Goodfellas

I know why I'm fond of watching this mob movie on Christmas day. Christmas '99, my mother gave me the laser disc version of the film. Remember laser discs? Me neither.

The Shawshank Redemption

Pretend this bon mot from the mouth of Captain Hadley is directed at Santa Claus:

What is your malfunction, you fat barrel of monkey spunk?


The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

My all-time favorite "Christmas movie that isn't a Christmas movie." Who needs Mary, Joseph and little baby Jesus in a manger when you got Sentenza, Tuco, and The Man With No Name?

[dodges lightning bolt]

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