Thursday, April 21, 2011

Block of Ages

I came across this banner the other day while passing by the local Menards and found myself positively compelled to capture the magic in gloriously digital detail, though I am, as of yet, uncertain as to the why part of the process. But that's not the half of it, really, as questions abound. Questions, questions, questions, I say.

Why, for example, are concrete blocks so popular as to require a a goddamn banner? And let me stress here that the photo belies the size of this thing. It's quite large, and size does indeed matter, especially when we're discussing an arguably superfluous advertisement in the first place.  So again, is it necessary to advertise concrete blocks? I know concrete blocks like the back of my hand, and I say no.

Secondly, the context. It's a Menards, people. If, just for shits and giggles, we're to assume that concrete blocks require banners and whatnot -and I'm not saying they don't, but I am, actually- would Menards need to advertise them? Again, I say no, on account of it being a Menards. In fact, if I were in the market for concrete blocks -say, to drop onto some douche bag yuppie's BMW from an overpass- Menards would be just about the FIRST FUCKING PLACE on my mind to shop. Seriously, that would be like going to Wal-Mart only to see a ginormous banner on the exterior that read We Sell Shitty Electronics!! 

Also, why am I consumed by the desire to acquire concrete blocks? It can't be the banner itself, no way, but the banner got me thinking about concrete blocks, and the thought of concrete blocks gets me thinking about dropping them on some manicured fuck's windshield, and...

Oh Menards, you sly dog. I should have known. 

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