Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Creeping

These are some of the things I've learned about you so far, and please don't be mad at me for taking an interest in you as that -thanks to our friend, the Internet- is just the way the world works.

- You look sexy in cargo shorts and M*A*S*H t-shirts.
- You can make a casserole from nothing but a piece of sky and a bowl of wet Bisquick.
- You can write a snappy blog post faster than you can say "POTENTIALLY PERFIDIOUS, PET"
- You know all the words to "The Gambler"AND don't try to deny it.
- You want to title your PhD dissertation: "Stickin' it to Korean High School Teachers and Policy Makers: Why Teaching English in English is a Flawed System Doomed to Fail" and don't care that you'll never, ever get post-doc funding.
- You don't know when to walk away, but do know when to run.
- You know just what to do when someone leaves their Blogger/Facebook/Twitter/email account open on your computer!
- You have excellent taste in music, which just so happens to mirror a good portion of my own.
- Short bangs suit you.
- Your mother sounds as if she's one of the most caring and generous mothers a person could have even though she abstains from alcohol and other recreational drugs.
- You're well-educated and detail-oriented.
-You keep your blog posts to six paragraphs or less, since more than that renders a post unreadable.
- You look great in a hat and sunglasses.
- Contrary to what you've been told, you have an extraordinary smile.
- HTML is your specialty.
- When you're mistaken about something, you'll readily admit such errors.
- The readers of your blog are fiercely loyal to the point of sheer rabidity, and woe to the woman with four children who doesn't know when to quit teasing you.
- You're enamored with motorcycles.
- You know how to work a camera, be it from behind or in front of the lens.
- You're probably in love with me. Just maybe...

4 comments:

SuperFantabulous said...

This person sounds very creepworthy. Who is it?

Melissa said...

What a lovely post!

William George said...

Are you talking about The Masked Masturbator?

I thought he went back home, detoxed, saw a shrink, and became a normal productive member of society?

Chicken Wire, the Harbinger of Heavenly Annotation said...

SuFab: lips and all that (but I'll send you the answer via Morse code shortly)

Melissa: a scary story indeed

William George: no, it's not Denz (though he does look rather fetching in M*A*S*H t-shirts), so try again!