Thursday, June 19, 2008

Politics and Bullshit


I wasn't an activist or anything as a youth, but I had some strong opinions, usually bred by the music I listened to and every young man's frustration with all things authoritarian. These days, the only political conviction I have is that Obama should be the next U.S. president because he's a fan of The Wire and he smokes squares, which is why it bugs the pluperfect shit out of me every time I'm assaulted with propaganda both political and religious (and, in the case of Internet fanboys, geek-infested). Just let me live my life, Comanche. I love to hear opinions, but cool it with the vitriol and the anger. Sorry if I ruined your Black Panther party.

Apparently DMC of Run-DMC is in Seoul, and at a press conference he was asked about his stance on the US-Korea beef issue. As can be expected of a has-been 80s hip-hop icon*, dude didn't know what the fuck was going on. But the Korean press kept, um, pressing him, until a PR agent informed him of the issue, to which his tougher-than-leather response was "I don't have beef with anybody!" or something along those lines.

Kudos to Darryl McDaniels for the quick-witted response, which I'm sure the cocksucker fraternity that is the Korean press didn't get; but what vexes me is why he'd have to address the issue in the first place, like he's Donald Rumsfeld or some shit. I'm afraid this insanity is spreading to the point where celebrities will come to Korea only to be barraged with political questions, and what's so perplexing is that it seems the Korean media doesn't realize the harm they're causing by accosting any American who happens to step foot in Korea with such idiocy. I'm sure DMC was thinking Jesus, what's with the hostility? Hopefully someone took him to an anma afterward to help him relax; and, thankfully, he wasn't asked to wear a hanbok. Yet.

Welcome to Planet Korea, where the locals assume you're just as passionate about their latest silly "controversy" as they are. The American beef issue runs deeper, but not to most of the general populace, and certainly not to America's. The U.S. is forever the heel, and it doesn't take much to get those WWE-style "you suck" chants started. All it takes is a little coaxing from biased-as-fuck interest groups; which is ironic, because as vehemently as U.S. beef is being protested against, most of the protesters are being herded like cattle. But, like me as a lad considering joining the Nation of Islam because Chuck D sounded like he was pissed the fuck off and had found a solution**, eventually these idiots are going to wake up to the sobering reality that YOU CAN GET ALONG FINE EATING BEAN SPROUTS AND CHICKEN ANUSES. It has worked for me.

Maybe it was my upbringing, but I've long believed that you shouldn't under any circumstance whine about food. It's food! It provides you with energy to continue living. It's not as though if U.S. beef imports come to Korea all of a sudden denizens of the peninsula will start gnawing on each other's grey matter and frothing at the mouth, although that would be pretty cool and I secretly wish for it to happen; no, all these bovine asshat protesters and their puppet masters need to do is EAT SOMETHING ELSE. Like raw squid. Or burnt baby flesh.

---

I do editing. I'm an editor. And today when I wrote "Myanmar" some firebrand proofreader shot back with "Burma," underlined in red.

Give me a break.



* Was that too harsh? Clearly, I have some issues with Run-DMC. (Mostly with Run, to be fair.)

** Got a woman C-O to call me a copter. She tried to get away, and I popped her.

2 comments:

denz said...

Also, Obama can ball.

Anonymous said...

DMC without Run and Jay is like Voltron with only one tiger...