And a Horse Named Trigger

Kmart -- depending on how you know him, he's either Kennan Highly or "that weird dude who hangs around my junior high entrance gates in a trench coat" -- recommends me stuff from time to time, be it music, movies, murder weapons (icicles!), or video games. In that way, he's both my Svengali and my life coach. As reciprocation, I let him "pet" my dog and drink my tap water. Clearly, this give-and-take friendship is lopsided, Kmart my sugar daddy of entertainment, I a frigid, uncaring and often ambivalent vampire/cat.

Admittedly, I am a stubborn ass when it comes to recommendations outside of my comfort zone. I hear steak, coffee, and anal sex are hugely popular with millions of people, but none of them are my thing. Ditto for RPG games; and so when Kmart came to me in 2008 and asked if I could

(smuggle Rita Hayworth into the prison for him)

give Chrono Trigger a try, I said it would be no problem at all. Because I already knew what my opinion would be.

That opinion, like a lot of the opinions I harbor -- women shouldn't be allowed to vote, crocodiles are just retarded alligators -- turned out to be dead wrong. Chrono Trigger is possibly the most fun gaming experience I've had on the Nintendo DS, and I'm more than a little regretful I was too busy "watching" Baywatch and earning experience points as a delinquent to have played it when it was originally released 14 years ago.

But now I've finally been converted. God bless Kmart, for he is truly doing the Lord's work.

PS - I'm making a shirt: Crono&Lucca&Marle&Frog&Robo&Ayla

PPS -