The Okinawa Fifteen

That's right, bitches! Thanks to the protracted chant* of a nonexistent princess from an equally hallucinatory Japanese royal family, King Caesar -known to the rubes as Jeff- himself has arisen from his slumber to bolster the ranks of the PK Pantheon (as well as defend the honor of Pringles** around the globe), and I for one appreciate all of you, Retards amongst retards.***

* All kidding aside, that song just keeps going.

** Have you seen the newly stocked Pringles at joints like Lotte Mart and E-Mart? Those fucking turds aren't Pringles, and I don't wish to digress too much, but I can't (in good conscience) allow such deception to go unnoticed.

Note the difference in size between the cans, the one on the right being the traditional can of snacks. (Before anyone starts bitching about my purchase of Light Pringles, keep in mind that it was the only kind available to use for comparison.)

As you can clearly see, the chips themselves are pale imitations of the real deal. I'm not going to waste much time discussing the issue, as the pictures speak for themselves, but I will openly criticize Procter & Gamble for this unabashedly shameless clusterforbes. Cultural relativity my ass; don't fuck with shit that was perfected years ago, yeah? It's bad enough that Cheetos have been irreparably tarnished, Asia, but now you gotta give Pringles the dirty sanchez, too?

*** The Special Olympics ain't got nothin'!